As we near to the end of June, it's clear we are reaching a point of mediocrity for the charts. Most of the songs on this list are simply too un-note worthy to be interesting, and a few I'd even call bad. It's pretty depressing when you reach the middle of summer, when music should be at it's height, and find that it amounts to a whole load of bland nothing. Anyway, here's the list of bland nothing, starting with:
10. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber (Chart Position - 1)
Do I need to repeat myself again? This is poor on all levels, and, worse, feels like a very bad case of cultural appropriation. I'm not quite sure what to make of this song, because it just feels offensive more than anything else. I sincerely doubt this song's going to disappear in the next few weeks, so I'll have to try and come up with some new criticism I haven't mentioned before. For now, the word mind-numbing springs to mind.
9. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne (Chart Position - 2)
Wow. When the number 1 and 2 position songs on the chart are my two least favourite songs in the top 10, it looks like things are in trouble. I've said this has a fairly mediocre beat, a messy amount of contributing artists, some poor lyrics and some even poorer vocals before. And, guess what? I stand by everything I've said. This is simply not of an acceptable quality, and it's top 10 presence is baffling, if not surprising considering one of the artist's attached to the song.
8. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber (Chart Position - 7)
Three songs featuring Justin Bieber at the bottom of the rankings? That's a surprise! 2U, however, has more problems than just Bieber's phoned in, irritating delivery. Remember David Guetta, a man who stood at the front of the EDM wave at the beginning of the decade? Well, any claims he's still at the front of that wave are dead in the water after this. 2U is a miserable EDM song that puts a downer onto you with it's depressing beat and even more depressing lyrics. Seriously, I feel like this is totally against the sprit of EDM, and just doesn't fit with the bombastic beat-drop that Guetta was going for. It doesn't help that the whole thing feels like a slightly rearranged version of Titanium. This song is probably the death knell for EDM: a shame, since I feel like it's a genre still with a lot to say. It's going to have to have a very hard look at itself after this, I think.
7. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee (Chart Position - 3)
I can only assume the reason why this is still here is because people forget what it is, and decide to give it a listen, thinking it's a new song. Because, in any sane world, this would have been dumped from the charts a long time ago.
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo (Chart Position - 6)
I still think this is a massive mis-step for Liam Payne. Had he tried to do this sort of stuff three or four years ago, it could be argued that he was starting a new trend in music. But instead, he releases this in 2017, and it just looks like a poor man's cash-in on a genre with little to say of interest. I can't really be bothered with this anymore, except to say that I hope Liam does well, but I'll be worried if he continues down this line.
5. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe (Chart Position - 4)
Nope... This is still Jonas Blue's worst song.
4. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes (Chart Position - 9)
Nope... This is still Shawn Mendes' most mediocre song.
3. Attention - Charlie Puth (Chart Position - 8)
Nope... This is still Shawn Mendes' most mediocre song.
Is handed note.
Sorry... Nope... This is still 'Charlie Puth's' most mediocre song.
2. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller (Chart Position - 5)
Ok... This is totally uncharted territory. I... like... a DJ Khaled song. Yes, I'm perturbed too. I think this wins out over I'm The One thanks to it's hypnotic nature and the fact that Rihanna is a much stronger performance than Bieber and his retinue. I didn't think Rihanna could give this kind of performance after Work, which was simply one of the biggest drony pieces of nonsense ever produced. However, here, she uses her vocals in a way she hasn't done since her Disturbia days, and it's where Rihanna's comfortable, because she's great here. That's helped by a strong instrumental, which manages to combine the Shawn Mendes guitar melody of There's Nothing Holding Me Back and the downbeat instrumental of Attention, but never lets either element gain dominance. I love the way that it's so downplayed: it's like being hypnotised, which is a feeling added to by Bryson Tiller's guest verse. It's not quite as good as Rihanna's complex vocals, but nevertheless, it's still much more subtle than the usual contributions from certain suspects on songs like this. The only downside is the constant repetition of DJ Khaled's tag-lines throughout the song, which feel forced in and don't fit with the song at all. But that doesn't stop Wild Thoughts from being a massively strong surprise, which, like Stay, manages to do something new with a genre that I'd written off.
1. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE (Chart Position - 10)
I've had sometime to think about this song, and I think one of the principle reasons why I like it so much is because of the message it gives out. It's about seeing past the image that each girl gives out: the stereotype. Every one is more complex than they make out (although I know a few that are slightly more straightforward than they like to make out), and that's what this song is tapping into. Sure, some of the remix elements don't quite work, and it says something about the music industry that a song like this needs to be remixed to be palatable to a wider audience, but I still think that has something interesting to say. Beyond that... it's still a bit of an anomaly with me. Sometimes songs have that effect.
So, this is the Spotify Chart cross-compared with my listings for ease of reference:
Spotify:
1. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber
2. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne
3. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee
4. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe
5. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo
7. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber
8. Attention - Charlie Puth
9. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes
10. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE
Me:
1. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE
2. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller
3. Attention - Charlie Puth
4. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes
5. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo
7. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee
8. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber
9. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne
10. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber
Let this madness end.
10. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber (Chart Position - 1)Do I need to repeat myself again? This is poor on all levels, and, worse, feels like a very bad case of cultural appropriation. I'm not quite sure what to make of this song, because it just feels offensive more than anything else. I sincerely doubt this song's going to disappear in the next few weeks, so I'll have to try and come up with some new criticism I haven't mentioned before. For now, the word mind-numbing springs to mind.
9. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne (Chart Position - 2)
Wow. When the number 1 and 2 position songs on the chart are my two least favourite songs in the top 10, it looks like things are in trouble. I've said this has a fairly mediocre beat, a messy amount of contributing artists, some poor lyrics and some even poorer vocals before. And, guess what? I stand by everything I've said. This is simply not of an acceptable quality, and it's top 10 presence is baffling, if not surprising considering one of the artist's attached to the song.
8. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber (Chart Position - 7)
Three songs featuring Justin Bieber at the bottom of the rankings? That's a surprise! 2U, however, has more problems than just Bieber's phoned in, irritating delivery. Remember David Guetta, a man who stood at the front of the EDM wave at the beginning of the decade? Well, any claims he's still at the front of that wave are dead in the water after this. 2U is a miserable EDM song that puts a downer onto you with it's depressing beat and even more depressing lyrics. Seriously, I feel like this is totally against the sprit of EDM, and just doesn't fit with the bombastic beat-drop that Guetta was going for. It doesn't help that the whole thing feels like a slightly rearranged version of Titanium. This song is probably the death knell for EDM: a shame, since I feel like it's a genre still with a lot to say. It's going to have to have a very hard look at itself after this, I think. 
7. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee (Chart Position - 3)I can only assume the reason why this is still here is because people forget what it is, and decide to give it a listen, thinking it's a new song. Because, in any sane world, this would have been dumped from the charts a long time ago.
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo (Chart Position - 6)
I still think this is a massive mis-step for Liam Payne. Had he tried to do this sort of stuff three or four years ago, it could be argued that he was starting a new trend in music. But instead, he releases this in 2017, and it just looks like a poor man's cash-in on a genre with little to say of interest. I can't really be bothered with this anymore, except to say that I hope Liam does well, but I'll be worried if he continues down this line. 
5. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe (Chart Position - 4)Nope... This is still Jonas Blue's worst song.
4. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes (Chart Position - 9)
Nope... This is still Shawn Mendes' most mediocre song.
3. Attention - Charlie Puth (Chart Position - 8)Nope... This is still Shawn Mendes' most mediocre song.
Is handed note.
Sorry... Nope... This is still 'Charlie Puth's' most mediocre song.
2. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller (Chart Position - 5)
Ok... This is totally uncharted territory. I... like... a DJ Khaled song. Yes, I'm perturbed too. I think this wins out over I'm The One thanks to it's hypnotic nature and the fact that Rihanna is a much stronger performance than Bieber and his retinue. I didn't think Rihanna could give this kind of performance after Work, which was simply one of the biggest drony pieces of nonsense ever produced. However, here, she uses her vocals in a way she hasn't done since her Disturbia days, and it's where Rihanna's comfortable, because she's great here. That's helped by a strong instrumental, which manages to combine the Shawn Mendes guitar melody of There's Nothing Holding Me Back and the downbeat instrumental of Attention, but never lets either element gain dominance. I love the way that it's so downplayed: it's like being hypnotised, which is a feeling added to by Bryson Tiller's guest verse. It's not quite as good as Rihanna's complex vocals, but nevertheless, it's still much more subtle than the usual contributions from certain suspects on songs like this. The only downside is the constant repetition of DJ Khaled's tag-lines throughout the song, which feel forced in and don't fit with the song at all. But that doesn't stop Wild Thoughts from being a massively strong surprise, which, like Stay, manages to do something new with a genre that I'd written off. 
1. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE (Chart Position - 10)I've had sometime to think about this song, and I think one of the principle reasons why I like it so much is because of the message it gives out. It's about seeing past the image that each girl gives out: the stereotype. Every one is more complex than they make out (although I know a few that are slightly more straightforward than they like to make out), and that's what this song is tapping into. Sure, some of the remix elements don't quite work, and it says something about the music industry that a song like this needs to be remixed to be palatable to a wider audience, but I still think that has something interesting to say. Beyond that... it's still a bit of an anomaly with me. Sometimes songs have that effect.
So, this is the Spotify Chart cross-compared with my listings for ease of reference:
Spotify:
1. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber
2. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne
3. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee
4. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe
5. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo
7. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber
8. Attention - Charlie Puth
9. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes
10. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE
Me:
1. Pretty Girl: Cheat Codes X CADE Remix - Maggie Lindemann, Cheat Codes & CADE
2. Wild Thoughts - DJ Khaled, Rihanna & Bryson Tiller
3. Attention - Charlie Puth
4. There's Nothing Holding Me Back - Shawn Mendes
5. Mama - Jonas Blue & William Singe
6. Strip That Down - Liam Payne & Quavo
7. Unforgettable - French Montana & Swae Lee
8. 2U - David Guetta & Justin Bieber
9. I'm The One - DJ Khaled, Justin Bieber, Quavo, Chance The Rapper & Lil Wayne
10. Despacito: Remix - Luis Fonsi, Daddy Yankee & Justin Bieber
Let this madness end.
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